finding your safe haven

Another post from my prior blog. this one is about finding your safe haven through meditating or journeying within.

The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.

-- Maya Angelou --

“Finding a sanctuary, a place apart from time, is not so different from finding a faith.” 

-- Pico Iyer --

I was hanging out with a friend this week talking, as we usually do, about her multiple illnesses. I have told her in the past and reminded her again on this day: some of her illnesses are due to her stressful lifestyle. But, hey, don’t we all have stressful lives. Anyway, she asked me to suggest a few ways to help relieve her stress; things that are quick, easy to do, easy to remember, and don’t take up space.

I suggested she try meditation. But, she said she has tried it many times but can’t. Could I instead suggest something I’ve done, that has worked? I suggested she try my inward journey and that we try it right then. She agreed. Here is how it works:

Find a comfortable place to sit (if not possible, sit where you can). Make sure your hands, arms, feet and legs are relaxed and not crossed. Close your eyes and take several deep breaths. When you breathe in, start from the bottom of your stomach and fill your entire body. When you breathe out, let it all flow out. As you get comfortable with the deep breaths, as you breathe out, imagine your stress leaving your body…out from your toes and your fingertips. And as you breathe in, imagine a white light filling you from the top of your head. When you are filled with white light and free of your stress, then breathe easy. It is time to take your journey.

Create in your mind the one place you would love to go if you could just disappear to your “safe haven” any time you felt. Imagine the sights and smells and sounds. Stay as long as you like. When you are finished, get up and stretch and go about the rest of your day, hopefully better than you were.

I know of someone who created a castle as her haven. She would sit on her throne, listen to beautiful music, and be catered to by gorgeous men and women. Another person created a cottage, in a meadow. Inside the cottage were a great big armchair, a library, lots of blankets and pillows for sitting, and a talking. My “safe haven” is a garden with a hammock, a lake, and a gazebo. The grass smells of herbs as you walk on it and beautiful music plays in the background.

When I tried this with my girlfriend, she said it definitely helped her feel better. The breathing exercises helped her release her stress. She also said when she saw her “safe haven “ she was an adult playing in her favorite spot as a child with her friends from years ago. She said it all felt good. She said she would definitely remember to do this whenever she was stressed. Please take this week and try this journey. I hope it helps you as much as it helped my girlfriend.

 “The whole of meditation practice can be "essentialized" into these 3 crucial points: Bring your mind home. Release. And relax!” 
-- Sogyal Rinpoche --