i get to... more

-- artist Brian Rolfe --

“In many Shamanic societies,

if you came to a medicine person complaining of being disheartened, dispirited, or depressed, they would ask one of four questions.

When did you stop dancing? When did you stop singing?

When did you stop being enchanted by stories?

When did you stop finding comfort in the sweet territory of silence?”

—Angeles Arrien wrote this in the forward to Gabrielle Roth's book --

i love to dance, to lose myself in the rhythm, and join the melody of music. i love to sing; especially when i am alone - loud and intense, with a microphone and a videographer… in my mind. i also love to listen to and to tell stories. i am fascinated by how people think, the types of stories they share, and what it says about them… and me. i am also amazed at the people of this world - other people and myself. i am amazed at how interrelated we are. i wonder at the who and the why of people, and i enjoy spending time with people - i relish listening to their philosophies, learning their nuances, and experiencing adventures together. i have learned i am not in this life truly alone, and though i tend to be a loner, i am also a social being.

i also love being outdoors, in nature - under the bright rays of the sun, enjoying the bite of a breeze, feeling the splash of rain, or wondering at the beauty of falling snow. i also love silence, quiet moments, soft serenity, and simple reflection. i find comfort in knowing that if i can sit alone… in silence and listen to the voice within me - like in meditation, then i can be in a better place with all aspects of my life. i am comforted knowing there is a guide within me, waiting to share with me the things i already know - the things i don’t know, but can know, if i ask and then listen… in silence.

i’ve seen people come and go, succeed and fail, live and die, cry and laugh, sing and dance, celebrate and hibernate.  i’ve seen a lot, i’ve learned a lot, i’ve also experienced a lot. in fact, i’ve experienced more than i know and that’s okay. the more i experience, the more i get to know; and even though the more i know, the more i realize there is so much that i don’t know; that is also okay - it means i get to have more chances to know more and to experience more. it also means i get to dance more, to sing more, to wonder more… be fascinated and amazed more (at the stories i read and hear, and at life), and i get to spend more time in the comfort of silence and meditation. basically i get to live more, and enjoy the more i’m living...

honoring yourself

“Beauty shouldn’t be about changing yourself to achieve an ideal or be more socially acceptable.

Real beauty, the interesting, truly pleasing kind, is about honoring the beauty within you and without you.

It’s about knowing that someone else’s definition of pretty has no hold over you.”

-- Golda Poretsky --

I say…  you honour yourself when you trust yourself, your gut, your instincts.

you honour yourself when you allow yourself to be your true being, when you see yourself for who you are and accept what you see - with all your failures, mistakes, and imperfections; with all your successes, accomplishments, and beauty.

you honour yourself when you believe in yourself - when you believe you can be all that you want, when you believe you can do all that you want, when you believe you can have all you want, when you believe you matter. when you believe you are enough. you hour yourself when you believe in you

how do you hour yourself? you trust, allow, and believe in YOU!!

“The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows & the beauty of a woman only grows with passing years.”

--Audrey Hepburn --

We all need to honour ourselves if we are to live vital, vibrant, exciting lives of passion. We need to honour ourselves if we are going to live by our choices. How do we do that? We take responsibility for what we perceive are our needs and desires. We take responsibility for our thought, feelings, and emotions. We take responsibility for our beliefs and our truths. We take responsibility for our actions and the consequences of our actions. We take responsibility for everything. Once we do that, we can begin to create our life in a way that honours what we are responsible for!!!

An important point - we are not on this planet alone, and we cannot succeed by believing we are in this alone and that we must do it alone. The line -”no man is an island” is significant because it is true. We did not come here alone, we do not exist alone, we do not succeed alone. It is not our purpose to be alone. We can choose to be alone, but that is a choice, and those who choose to always and only be alone are not truly living. So, let us remember to honour those who are a part of our lives. When we honour them, we honour ourselves.  Let us honor our parents, our children, our our peers, our neighbors, the people we pass, the people we come in contact with, the people we have known, the people we will know.

i will honor me

i will honor me

in this world i live in

i will do that with

my thoughts, dreams, beliefs, and actions

i will

honor my word

live by my principles

be true to me

i will

listen to my mind, my instincts, my gut

be honest about my needs and my time

love and respect me

i will

look my best

take care of my body

take good care of me

i will

not worry about the other person

not look back or dwell on my mistakes

let all that go and let the past be

i will

remember - what i think, determines what i create

what i put out is what i get back

and how i see others i how they will see me

i will

give it my all and do it for me

i will honor me

Dream! Create! Believe!

She designed a life she loved and that has made all the difference

Lot of talk lately about how to live the life dreams are made of. Lots of opinions, suggestions, ideas, and options. I've listened a lot, read a lot, and thought even more about this subject. One thing is certain - the dreams we have are no accident. They would not rest in our hearts, if they could not happen. The would not abide in our souls, if we weren't meant to have them. They would not squeeze our hearts with longing, if they weren't real... if they weren't possibilities. 

How do we acquire our dreams? How do we live the lives we desire the most? I think we have to get out of our own way. We have to look fear in the face, realize that it is False Evidence Appearing Real, and tell it to be on its way. Once we release fear - a day-by-day process until it becomes natural for us; we can begin to live. 

We start in our heads - that is where so many of us spend most of our time anyway. We  DReaM in our heads. We create the highest, grandest dream possible for ourselves. We dream the truest dream for us. Don't dream someone else's dream, dream your own dream. Step into your big dog shoes, look at your life and decide what life you - being true to you, want. Now I know some of you are thinking- "but it's in my head..." My response- of course it's happening inside your head, where else would it start. You have to think it before it can happen. You have to know what you want before it can be true for you.That doesn't  mean it isn't real. If anything, that is what makes it real. If you can see it in your head, you can create it in your reality. So... design the life you want. Dream big! 

Next - believe it! It is in believing in your dreams that you become your dreams. Be your dreams! Believe in the dreams you have for your life, because you become what you believe.Believe it in your heart. Your heart is the home of possibilities. Your heart is the space from which you can create. Your heart is where faith in yourself and your possibilities exist. So, close your eyes, imagine your dream life, and  fell it flow through you. Give it depth. Strengthen it with faith. Have confidence in its possibility. Be it! That's right! Be. Your. Dreams. Imagine yourself in your life - being it... living it... having it! The more you believe, the more intense your vision of it will be. The more intense your vision, the more likely you will have it.

Then Create it! You are the creator of your life. How you design it, is how you will live it; so design a life you will love. No one else can do it for you. Think about it. Set a course of action for it, and Do it. Do what it takes to have your dreams. Do it with joy and gratitude. Do it from a space of unknown possibilities. Be committed to your dream showing up for you however it needs to show up for you. The universe will rise up to meet you and say yes. Just step up to your dream and begin. 

If you DReaM the life you truly desire. If you BeLieVe in your heart that this life is possible, and then CReaTe your dream life with your actions...  If you BEcome your dream,if you DO what it takes, with trust, faith, and gratitude... you will HAVE the life of your dreams!!! 

I'm not saying its going to be a cake walk. You will have bad days. But your being will get you through. Your believing will keep you going. Your doing will provide results. So... Dream! Create! Believe! ... Be your dreams! Do what it take! You will Have your heart's desire!

Just get up and go for it! You got this!!!

Loving Winter and Snow

"Winter, a lingering season, is a time to gather golden moments, embark on a sentimental journey, 

and enjoy every idle hour."

-- John Boswell --

I have been looking back over some of my blogs and I am surprised I have not written about snow, especially since we've had a lot this winter. Especially since I love winter... and snow - the excitement of the first snow, the beauty of freshly fallen snow, the bite of winter's chill, the multiple opportunities and ways to snuggle.

I have thought about my love of winter since most people I know think love of winter is crazy. What I know is this - I love all seasons; each brings something new to the pot. As each season ends and a new one begins, we learn to let go of the past and to embrace the possibilities the future has in store for us. We learn that life is a cycle; that though we may go through similar experiences in life, each one has it's own twists and turns, each one sees us in a different place and so we show up different. It's like that expression - "no man ever steps in the same river twice".  Each season brings changes we get to choose to work with. So having different seasons is good.

Winter, though.... winter brings with it challenges that the other months don't. It rains, snows, sleets, and hails. It brings icy conditions, slippery roads and streets, frost bite, and below freezing wind chill factors. But winter also means warm coats to snuggle into, thick blankets and sort comforters to burrow into, and fuzzy scarfs and boots to slip into. Winter means hot chocolate with marshmallows, Christmas, New Years Eve , and Valentine's Day. Winter means fireside chats, cozy dinners with friends, and long, late-night phone calls. And have you ever noticed - people seem nicer, kinder, and more aware of others during the colder winter months.

Winter is a chance, an excuse to cuddle, to snuggle, to stay inside and get closer, to become more intimate, and more connected. Winter gives you more opportunities to open up, reveal ourselves, and expose your vulnerabilities. With the wind at your door, old snow piled up on your lawns, and ice pelting your windows, you can be inside - the fireplace blazing, your favorite music playing, the lights low, a side table with a bottle of merlot, quinoa, caesar salad. skirt steak, and red velvet cake on it, and good conversation and laughter filling the air. We do these things all year round, but winter brings a level of intimacy missing when the weather is nice and you are outdoors. Maybe it's that feeling of "we're all in this together" or maybe the need to be inside, huddled together against the cold, brings us closer to that new born feeling of being held or cradled. Whatever it is, I love it. I love winter. And though, as Spring approaches, I am ready to embrace warmer, sunny days and let go of winter - the dirty snow, the bitter cold, the hard, biting rain, and the dangerous roads; in my heart, I am also looking forward, with anticipation, to next year and the newness of winter and the excitement and changes next winter will have in store for me.

“Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home.”

― Edith Sitwell --

LoVe SPReaDeRS

I am a light bearer, a love spreader, a joy sharer, a dreamer.  There are, I believe, millions of us. We are not unhappy, but neither are we truly content. We seek not so much to explore life, as to explore people. We seek to understand people - why they say the things they say, do the things they do, think as they think, feel as they feel. We start by exploring ourselves, hoping to understand why we do, say, think, and feel the things we do. By understanding who we are, we hope to begin to understand others.

We are earth lovers. We like to walk in the rain, feel the wind tangle in our hair, and the breezes tingle across our skin. We appreciate the beauty of a first snow, the smell of babies, the unconditional loyalty of pets, the sound of birds, the fragrance of flowers, and the serenity of trees. We fill our homes with art, music, flowers, books, and things that bring us joy. We are drawn by Mother Nature - taken by her power, her mystery, her majesty, and her unspeakable beauty. We are intrigued by forests and awe-struck by mountains. We are fascinated by the mystery of deserts, hidden caves, and obscure rivers. We are especially at home in large, lonely cities. We can be as mercurial as the weather in London, our emotions running deeper than the oceans of the world. Indeed, our sadness is as much a part of our lives as is our laughter; and finding someone we love to share our sadness with, and not feel shame, is perhaps one of the greatest joys we can know.

We are idealists who often feel alone in the world. We want so much to love and give and are often broken hearted by the response we receive when we open our hearts. Some of us have taken to hiding our light in fear of rejection. Some of us have stopped trusting our natural instinct to love - it is so often misunderstood.  But, we look out for those who are like us, long for those who are willing to understand and accept us, and rejoice when we find those who are willing to love us.

We are as simple as we are complicated. We are both hard to understand and easy to read.  Simply put - we seek joy and light, kindness and compassion, serenity and enlightenment. In ourselves, others, and  the world… just as we look everywhere for magical moments, the grace of blessings, and everything beautiful. Most of all, we seek love - love to give and love to receive. We want to live fully, feel deeply, and enjoy relationships that will encourage our light to brighten, and our love to flow..

For dreamers, light-bearers, joy seekers, and love spreaders…  for men and women who dare to ask of life everything good, loving, light-filled, and beautiful; I say - let us stand together and love. Let us trust and love. Let us bring joy and love. For when we do, our light shines bright, and our love can fill and change the world.

-- asd --

Loving Yourself around Valentine's Day

I wrote this piece two weeks ago. But it has just sat in my save file. For some reason I have been unable to finish it. Well today, is the day. This piece is finished and I am Posting it. I hope you enjoy it as much I enjoyed writing it and I hope it remains with you as it has remained in my save file.  It is about Valentine's Day and loving yourself...

Valentine's day came and went. I spent it as I have spent most Valentine's Days - with family and friends. At some point, we got into the usual V-day discussion of whether or not it should be celebrated or ignored because the only people who really benefit are card, chocolate, and flower shops, restaurants and jewelers. Most said they don't celebrate because they show love year round and don't need V-day to show or prove their love.

I gave an answer I still stick with but V-day brought up some other issues for me- like trust. I have come to a few conclusions I have been working on. I would like to share them with you.

First, V-day is like any special occasion day - like birthdays or thanksgiving, or Christmas. It is a day to celebrate love. While there will be those who will financially profit from the day, there is nothing wrong with a special day to say "I love you" to someone. Don't spend money if you are against the commercialism; but don't pass up an opportunity to say "I love you", to show your love. Or if you want to do something nice, without spending a penny; create a book of coupons. You know... "this coupon entitles you to one back massage", "this coupon entitles you to one car wash". Family members or friends... anyone would love this.

But, I think, the thing we are missing is that V-Day is not just about couples. It is about love - love of family, love of friends, love of self. We could have each spent the day loving on ourselves. How often do you take a day to just love yourself? How great would that have been? To have bought yourself you favorite flowers and chocolate? To have taken yourself to the movies or to an art show, or to a massage? What if you had run yourself a nice, hot bubble bath and then enjoedy it with a glass of wine?

It is true you can do these things any day of the week, But how many of us actually remember to take care of ourselves? How many of us treat ourselves as we want others to treat us? How many of us love on ourselves? Perhaps that is how we should have celebrated the day. 

Anyway, thinking about all this made me also think about what loving myself and others actually means. Love is about trust. If you love yourself, you trust yourself. Trusting yourself allows you to trust others and trusting another allows you to love them. Love without trust is not a healthy love - is not really love and does not last.

When you trust yourself - your dreams, your thoughts, your actions, you are more willing to take risks, you are more willing to be open to love. It does not mean you think you are perfect, but it does mean you give yourself credit for your authenticity, and you have faith in yourself and what you stand for. It also means you trust your opinions, feelings, intuition. 

When you trust yourself, your love for yourself grows. When you stand up for yourself, your love grows. Trusting yourself is the beginning of trusting others, just as loving yourself is the beginning of loving others. Sometimes life beats up on us and rather than acknowledging that life can do that, we sometimes blame ourselves. If we do that over a course of time, we stop trusting ourselves, we stop believing in ourselves and then we stop loving ourselves. Then one day, we wake up suspicious of everyone and we wonder what happened.

Days like V-Day can change that. Days that we set aside to love ourselves can restore our faith in ourselves. When we take the time to care for ourselves we remind ourselves that we matter, that we are worth it. This helps us to restore our trust in who we are, how we think, what we feel. This helps us to love ourselves more.

When we begin to trust ourselves, when we begin to love ourselves; we will discover the magic of trusting and loving others... and being trusted and loved. There is nothing like sharing who you are in open vulnerability and having that sharing reciprocated. There is nothing like LeaNiNG In, knowing the other person has you - nothing like having someone LeaN IntO you, trusting that you have them. There is nothing like sharing all of who you are, knowing the other person will accept you... and vice-verse. These are magical moments. I want these for myself. How about you?

I have decided, I am going to have a Valentine's Day year. I am going to take care of me, love on me, trust me. That way I will begin to love others, trust others and have magical moments. Why don't we all have a Valentine's year. I'm worth it. You're worth it. We're all worth it? So, let's do it!!!

"If you don't love yourself,

you'll always be chasing people who

don't love you either."

-- Mandy Hale --

-- asd --

we're back

i know it's been a minute. i bet most of you have forgotten sISTA gIRLS has a blog. Well we do. I write about once or twice a week depending on my moods and what I need to get off my chest. I love it when you respond to the blog and offer suggestions. It doesn't happen, often but when it does, i hear and acknowledge.

so... happy belated new year and all that. i hope you all have been well, that you enjoyed the holidays, are gearing up for Valentine's day (if you celebrate), are okay.

i hope you are enjoying winter, freshly falling snow, cold moonlit nights, snuggling under warm blankets, hot toddies, and comfy sweaters and robes.

we here at sISTA gIRLS have been busy preparing to become a real company. we are... hopefully... going to put out calendars and minibooks, and create a real opportunity for women of all ages, cultures, walks of life, and races to meet and get to know each other and thereby... create long-lasting, strong, supportive friendships.

one of our long-term goals is a wild woman weekend of fun, laughter, good times and memories. one of our short term goals is a "get to know one another" luncheon. we will keep you posted as things begin to fall into place... if things begin to fall in place.

in the meantime, i shall re-post some of our prior posts to spark your memories and give you a feel for what we want to share with you in the future. PLEASE feel free to like, share, pass along, offer suggestions and enjoy.

take care of you